I find that much of life is about finding ways to entertain oneself. This is for its own worth, and as a distraction from the madness, chaos, inhumanity and violence that plagues so much of life in this world. It has always been this way, and despite the progress we seem to think we have made, it continues to be.

Years ago, my friend Paul had two dreams, some months apart. He was at two concerts and a band was playing at each of them. He was in the audience for both shows. Apparently, they were very good.

The names of the bands were crystal clear to him; The Slaves of Modernity and The Ray Eaters. The dreams were so vivid that Paul did a web search to check if they actually existed. They didn’t and they don’t.

It took me a few years to bring Paul’s bands into existence. I started making band T-shirts, for me and for him, and for a select group of people who are comfortable wearing a shirt that promotes two fictitious bands that release fictitious records on a fictitious label, RoadKillRecords.

The bands carry out fictitious world tours. They spend a lot of time in North America, touring the US and Canada. They tour Europe and Australia regularly. They even toured during COVID. And incredibly, both bands were able to be in more than one country at the same time.

The bands haven’t recorded any new material or toured for a couple of years, principally because there are enough of their shirts out there, and Paul and I are well stocked with them.

And the bands need some time out. Being on the road all the time is exhausting. Whether they return to recording and touring is anyone’s guess. But if they don’t, we still have the memories and the T-shirts.

These are some of the shirts promoting two of the finest bands never to exist; The Slaves of Modernity and The Ray Eaters.